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Why I Will Never Gatecrash A Party Again

It’s Saturday night, I’m working, the neighbors have amazing music, I feel like asking them to turn it up…

In my mis-spent youth, I quickly realized that where the party music is good, you can get a bottle of wine, dress up nicely, smile, say “János invited us”, and that’s it.

But there were times when things didn’t quite go as planned…

Like when me (Caucasian) and some of my Asian friends tried to hit up a party that just sounded amazing, great music, awesome music system, we got so excited… We got our alcohol deals and knocked on the door. A smiling black man walked through the door, followed by 4 generations of smiling blacks in the living room, all remarkably similar, dressed in their Sunday best, and well, you guessed it, a family holiday! Red-faced, we quickly looked for our excuses. We said the wrong address. We went back to our home and watched TV alone.

Years later, this failure was apparently forgotten because I was tempted again. I didn’t learn my lesson.

My next door neighbors seemed to party every day. And I wasn’t invited. The music that filtered through the thick concrete walls sounded wonderful. The heavy bass, a nice beat and the sound of their laughter, well it was more than I could take! So, armed with a bottle of good wine, I plucked up my courage and knocked on their door; the point of no return. The door opened, they smiled broadly and said they must be very welcome. I was called in and I saw everyone sitting around the TV. Not many actually, just a few. They all watch The Jungle Book and sing and clap along. I didn’t like Jungle Book. Oh dear. It was a long night.

My face hurt after hours of forcing a smile on my face. My arm hurt after hours of forcing myself to clap. Only my voice was intact, but that was because I didn’t know the words to the songs.

Once the movie was finally over, I thanked them as sincerely as I could and retreated to the relative excitement of my home.

Needless to say, this was the last party I crashed. He learned his lesson.

As I write, the music of the neighbors next door (other property) sounds great. I simply touch it for temptation. It will pass. I enjoy music from afar. Life is good.

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